“Patience and Progress”

I was at small group last night and (don't worry I will reveal nothing of others' confidences) it came to our turn to ask for prayers. We offered a few suggestions of other things, but when it came time to talking about the baby's birth I just didn't know how to pray. On the one hand, I know that I'm just under 4 weeks from my due date. So, I'm still not even to term. It's not fair to be wishing this child out. On the other hand, the contractions have been almost incessant for nearly 4 days (sometimes going rhythmically and giving me false hope). They've become painful now, not just tightening ... so my doctors keep assuring me (once a week) that it will be soon. Steve's packed his labor bag. Kayleigh's stuff is semi-packed, but I can't seem to bring myself to be hopeful enough to pack my bag. I expressed all of this to my small group and then said, "I don't know how to pray ... perhaps you can find the words." Ben, one of our leaders said, "How about patience and progress." It's alliterative and I like it ... Patience and progress is my motto for the week.

At last check up I had made progress, good progress ... I just need to pray that it continues and the Lord gives me patience. So, any of my praying friends who read my blog ... perhaps you could pray for the same. I'm determined to not let impatience force me into what Robin and I call "the walk of shame." In other words, I will not call a babysitter, drop off my daughter, convince everyone it's time, only to be sent home. I spent way too long at the hospital the last time for that to be happening to me :) ...

On a completely different note, this week is crazy busy. Today we finish off the GK Tournament (two rounds this afternoon and evening should make a for a long night), Tuesday is a dual against Battle Creek Pennfield, Wednesday we have a dual in Mattawan, and Thursday is our 2nd of just 4 home matches against Galesburg. I'm not sure where in that line up is time to birth a baby boy ... maybe Friday would be best since we have no tournaments this weekend :)

Well, Kayleigh is still hanging out in bed (she was a VERY tired girl after all of her time with Grammy and Grandpa C this weekend; they kept her busy!), and I'm going to get in another load of laundry before she wakes.

Thanks, friends, for your thoughts and prayers. Kristi (and Steve, and Kayleigh and Baby Boy) :)

A little bit of fun …

I felt like today was a breath of fresh air in my week. I had so many encouraging responses to my crazy pregnancy blog, so many people offering best wishes or encouraging remarks (or even just commiserating with me). I have my 36 week appointment tomorrow, and I'm VERY ready to hear if there is any progress by way of effacement or dilation.  I'm trying not to get my hopes up too much, but I really just want to know what's going on. Anyway, with that appt to look forward to, and today's excitement, I'm finding it hard to get down to business and work :) ... Let me recap for you ... (a). Kayleigh woke up LATE and let me read a little of Grandpa and Grandma Van Dyk's life story. I've had it in the dresser and wanted to begin reading it ever since Grandma passed away. I know I shouldn't be as excited since they really are my Grandparents-in-law, but since my little daughter bears her Great Grandma's name, I want to know as much about her past as possible. It's been a very intriguing read, and I love that Great Grandpa and Great Grandma wrote it down for us.

(b). My little girl had some sassy attitude that was just makin' me laugh! (See first picture below). She INSISTED on wearing this plastic headband I stole from one of my tennis players last year. And she made me "apply her makeup" (aka put on chapstick and pretend to put on mascara and blush) before she'd play alone, AND she was feeling SUPER sweet because she was wearing her new Skechers from Grandma today. She would strut along, and stop and look at her feet; she'd get this big grin, and then strut somewhere. She definitely thought she was it and a bit!

(c). Kayleigh napped early (see second picture below) because, for what ever reason (probably all the tennis she's been to in the last week) she was exhausted!! While she was napping Aunt Alaina and RYAN showed up for playdate. I had one excited toddler when she woke up! She was happy!!! RRRYYYYAAAN ... she kept looking and pointing and saying his name. She was enthralled!

(d). After a nice lunch with Alaina and playtime for the kids (Ryan really wants to copy Kayleigh, and quite frankly, I think Kayleigh wants Ryan to follow her around), Kayleigh and I headed off to school to meet the "GGGIIRRLLS" for the tennis match ...

(e). We had only the single biggest dual match of our season tonight .. .Hackett Catholic Central. School rivals (although in tennis the girls all pretty much like each other) and our toughest league, region, and state competition!! Last year we were competitive all through the season but allies for Kalamazoo at the state meet. I like that balance. It keep us sharp all season long, but gives you double support when it comes to the larger, tense State meets. At any rate, we ended in a tie ... Hackett won all of the singles matches and Christian won all of the doubles matches. ... We haven't lost to Hackett since Robin and I have been coaching, so it was nice to not have that as a first. BUT, we also can't count it as a win ... maybe at the league tournament :) ...

(f). Steve and Kayleigh came to cheer us on as we finished the Hackett match and then we had a family dinner afterwards. I love that my husband has learned how to cheer (and enjoy) tennis ... something he really didn't do before we met and married. I truly think he enjoys watching the girls compete and experience success almost as much as I do.

(g). Now ... it's evening time and little baby boy is entertaining me with his acrobatics and intense contractions (all still false labor, I'm sure) as I send in the scores to the paper, prep a bit for the tournament on Saturday, and get to work on the curriculum projects that still really need my attention ... May 11 is coming soon ...

Enjoy these pictures of our day ... (well, Kayleigh's day. I'm not super into pictures right now) :) :)

[caption id="attachment_159" align="alignnone" width="224" caption="Kayleigh sense of "Style""][/caption]

[caption id="attachment_160" align="alignnone" width="225" caption="Just hanging out, rocking away ... you know, kickin' back"][/caption]

Abundant Blessings

One of the best parts about staying home is that I get to see the little, tiny miracles that happen each day as my daughter grows. One of the most difficult parts about staying home is that each morning, regardless of whether I feel awesome or not, she's ready and waiting to learn and grow! (There aren't "sick days" or "oops I'm late" mornings in the life of s.a.h.m.) But it's these mornings that God always chooses to show me something new and beautiful in my baby girl.

Yesterday from about 1:00 p.m. until about 4:00 a.m. I was having an insane number of Braxton Hicks contractions. They weren't painful (except when accompanied by lower back pain and pelvic pressure) just LONG and incessant! By 3:00 a.m. I was pacing, timing them using the stopwatch on my iPhone, and drinking buckets of water/OJ to get them to stop so I could sleep. NOTHING was working. Finally, I just laid down and accepted the fact that this wasn't true labor (albeit it many classic symptoms of pre-mature labor) and there wasn't much I could do. I wasn't going to wake my doctor in the middle of the night because I knew (without regular intervals or increasing pain/pressure) there wasn't much they'd do. So I was just frustrated.

I slept from 4:00 until 7:00 a.m. when my cat persisted in waking me (he gets to play in the garage and was NOT interested in letting me sleep late). Locking him out of the bedroom only produced mournful moaning, scratching at the bedroom door, and consistent interruptions. Since I didn't want his misbehavior to wake Kayleigh I got up ... called the dr and was told to stay at home for the morning. To sit down immediately when contractions began and drink fluids. If I had more than 6 in an hour, I was to head in to the office. Well, with a toddler, sitting to drink water and pay attention to painless (though annoying) contractions was not super high on my list. Let alone with tennis, preparations for labor/baby, plus work, I didn't have time to take the morning off. This shot my morning to pieces!

Yes, yes, I'm still getting to the Abundant Blessings part :) ...

Nevertheless, as my daughter woke and I thought about the 3.5 hours I had to entertain her, alone, in the house until it was nap time I was dreading what I'd do to fill those hours (especially knowing was supposed to sit and drink water). I'll admit, I was bawling as I fed her breakfast and that ... THAT ... is where God began to show up in an incredible way.

(1). My baby girl, normally quite focused on her meal, took a moment to stop shoveling in the Cheerios, called me over, and just took my hand and hugged it to her face. I don't think empathy or even sympathy truly develops until kids are closer to 3 or 4 but I believe Kayleigh sensed Mommy was sad and did her best to cheer me up.

(2). In a softer mood after some spontaneous kindness from my 17 month old, I started about diaper duty. K desperately wanted to help me so she crawled downstairs (one of her new found skills) and stood guard over me as I started the wash cycle. She didn't go play in the playroom (though I encouraged her to) . .she simply stood by my legs, rubbing them every so often with her head, saying "Mommmaaaa ... " in the tone she always uses when she's really saying, "I Love you ..."

(3). After that we went upstairs to play where Kayleigh went to her room to get her "anket." Its a morning tradition to be lazy at home and just lounge around all over the living room with her "anket" watching "tee tee." She told me, quite clearly to sit in the rocker. She hopped on the footrest (she's learned that trying to climb on my lap is pointless), covered both of us (as much as she could) in the blanket and laid her head in my lap. She said "bush ... bush" and sat still for almost 10 minutes while I brushed her hair (this is NEVER HAPPENED moment with my little mover).

Most of the morning continued this way with Kayleigh doing her best to be sweet, kind and playful. When it finally came to nap time I found myself surprised at how quickly it really had come about. The morning didn't take nearly as long as I thought (probably because of the sweetness of my baby girl). When I said it was nap time she dropped all of her kitchen utensils (She had been making Mommy "unch"), ran to my arms, hugged me, KISSED me on the lips (also a first) and said, "NIGH NIGH Momma." That was 34 minutes ago and I haven't heard a peep. I hung the diapers on the line and decided that I'd be remiss if didn't take time to thank the Lord (through this reflective, semi-public blog and privately in prayer) for the abundant blessing that is my daughter. She has her moments, but in the last week, she's been nothing short of angelic. She's so ready to be a big sister and helper ... I couldn't be more proud of the little sweet young lady she's becoming.

My heart is full ...  (and my body tired still ... so on that note, I'm taking my swollen feet/ankles/hands and falsely contracting body to bed ... maybe little ______ will stop pushing down long enough for Mommy to rest for a while. If this is any indicator of HIS disposition, the Lord knows I will need to take every advantage I can right now!)

Trying to enjoy the peace

I remember when I was at this stage of pregnancy with Kayleigh. All I could think about was getting to meet my baby; I didn't care about how drastically my life would change or what other personal freedoms it might cost me. My dad used to say, "Enjoy this time right now because you won't get it back for a very very long time." I'd laugh it off and just say, "Yeah, yeah I know ..." But secretly I just wanted my baby OUT! As I am approaching that same juncture with this little baby boy, I keep telling myself that I have a super good thing going right now. I need to enjoy THIS TIME because my life will drastically change very soon and won't ever be the same again. So, in an effort to just that, I'm going to list the reasons today alone that I'm thankful for my life as is ... (1). I woke up this morning relatively well rested (baby boy caused Mommy to get up at 1, 3, 5, 6, and 7 to use the bathroom BUT it was nothing I couldn't sleep walk through!) :) (2). My little girl, though awake by 7:15 chatted happily in her crib, playing with her fan and blanket and paci until 8:00 a.m. when I allow her to get up (3). I did not have to prepare any bottles for breakfast or do any annoying nipple scrubbing; I simply poured two handfuls of Cheerios on a tray with a glass of apple juice and said, "Good morning, angel." (4). At the grocery store, I handed all items to my toddler to put "in the cart" (aka toss behind her back and see if she makes it into the basket). This will not be happening soon as her little brother will likely be riding in that space and groceries will need to be carefully placed around him. (5). When loading the car, I had just one car seat to buckle/unbuckle. (6). Unloading groceries and bringing in the trash barrels was a game that we could play, not something requiring a balancing act (7). At nap time, I simply changed Kayleigh's diaper, plunked her back in the crib with her usual comforts and said, "nap time." Two hours later I returned to collect her, well rested, happy, and fresh off some excellent sleep (8). Lunch was remarkably easy ... grapes, string cheese, and a peanut butter sandwich ... which my daughter ate while I showered and packed for tennis. (9). Tennis practice was fantastic as my new mother's helper, Lizzie Bauss, simply ran around the school grounds with Kayleigh, avoiding the usual disasters (the creek, the flying baseballs, etc). Just Lizzie, some snacks and juice and that's all my little girl needs. (10). Kayleigh joined us at the dinner table and ate, largely, without interrupting. (11). Steve and Kayleigh just left for a Daddy/daughter ice cream date and Mommy is left with an unusual peace a little earlier in the evening ... (12). (And this is the biggest) ... at 8:00 p.m. (at the latest) I will place my daughter lovingly back in her crib and say, "I love you, precious. Night Night ... See you in the morning." I will then proceed to work diligently at my addalingua while watching ridiculous television and talking with my husband. I won't have a diaper to change, middle of the night feedings or wake up calls because of fear or any other issue. My daughter will sleep, or talk, or simply rest, but she won't need me for a blissful 12 hours. ... This I know I will miss ... dearly ... :)

And even as I say all of those things, knowing I won't have them so easy in the next month ... I don't want any readers to think I am not deliriously happy about the coming arrival of my baby boy. There isn't a single day that I don't thank the Lord for the life that I know is living in my belly ... (I can feel him kicking as I write). There isn't a day that I don't hope that we will meet very soon and I'll snuggle him in my arms ... loving even the neediness that comes with a newborn. Sigh ...

I guess I'm left to conclude that there are things to enjoy about each phase in our lives. I wouldn't trade the 4.5 years of marriage that Steve and I enjoyed without children for anything! We had blissful vacations with fruity drinks on the beach, sunsets and playoff basketball. We enjoyed many holidays without carting the obligatory diaper bags, extra entertainment, and necessary childhood comforts. We spent countless nights out at movies or dining out where we wished we had something else to say :) ...

In that same token we have enjoyed 17 months of being new parents ... watching just Kayleigh. Enjoying how she learns, watching as she is silly and aggressive, curious and playful! We've laughed at her antics, cried together when she was super sick, and spent time just staring as she slept.

And soon ... soon there will be "one for each" as we've been told to call it ...  a his and a hers. There will be moments to cherish as the kids grow individually and precious moments as they learn to interact with each other, and hopefully, love each other and become fast friends.  But for now, I'm going to try and cherish each and every last moment I have with Kayleigh only ... making sure she knows that she is loved, treasured, and valued no matter who else joins the picture :)

Far too soon …

Maybe it's the little boy kicking in my stomach, getting ready to make his appearance ... Maybe it's the hormone fluctuation ... Could be the busy-ness of tennis/deadlines at work... Maybe it's that stage in my firstborn daughter's life ... These past three days have been FULL of little moments that take my breath away. The kind I know I'll have as Kayleigh grows. I'm already anticipating the difficulties of sending her off to preschool, letting her play at her friends' houses, her first sleepover with someone other than family, her first date (YIKES!)/her first formal, etc. All of those things were in the back of my mind as I watched her take some of her own very independent steps this week ... some age appropriate, some not so much. :) I'll pair them, as I see them in my mind's eye, with equal memories of her as a tiny baby girl. 1. Then: I still remember the feeling I had when, as I was still pushing in labor, my doctor said, "Congratulations! You have a daughter!" I screamed, "WHAT??!!!" because I was so certain she was a boy. Don't get me wrong, I was ecstatic! (just shocked) Now: That same baby daughter met her first "boyfriend" at a tennis match today! (I heard this all through Steve, Bri and my mom who actually saw it. I was coaching 3D at the time). A little boy approached my angel, handed her a cracker and gave her a few of the tennis balls he had stashed away so that they could play together. In return, Kayleigh hugged him ... and stayed hugging him for a while. They chased each other around the tennis court for quite some time after that. She kept calling him Ryan (for her little cousin), but play they did. My prayer: I know I won't be able to stop little boys from liking my little girl. I can't really blame them. She's cute and amazingly fun. It's innocent now,  but I pray that God protects her sweet, trusting heart as she grows and that's she's able to find someone, someday (who's probably still in diapers of his own right now) who cares for her, loves her, and has Jesus as the model for his life. (This rocks my world because I thought I had a while to wait before I had to begin praying for her future husband. Today reminded me that it's not too early to start that prayer ... So, it begins today!)

2: Then: My little angel from 6 weeks on (after  we figured out her feeding issues), was the best sleeping snuggler ever! Her favorite (and really only) way to go to sleep was to be laid flat, chest down, head sideways on Mommy/Daddy's chest. She truly had no preference to one party or the other, but because I was working so much during the day, I often hogged the night time put to beds. She'd lay curled up for hours like that, never moving, only soft breathing. When that got too space constrictive for her, she'd lay sideways, face in, ears to the side and sleep. It wouldn't take more than one or two minutes when she got in that hold to simply snuggle up and drift off.  I'd hold her MUCH longer than that, just enjoying how much she liked being with Mommy. Now: Little cherub doesn't snuggle much ... when she's tired she will zone out on my lap for 10 minutes or so. But mostly we have to treasure those late night trips in from the van when she's totally conked out. That's about the only stand still snuggle time we get. Steve always gets those ... he's usually more alert after late night trips, and since he gets so little of the snuggles, he steals them when he can. Last night we drove home separately so I got them :) But, as I said, those moments are so rare. Kayleigh now refuses, even, to hold Mommy's hand when we are walking in a public place. She pushes your hand away because she wants her independence. It's as if she's saying, "No, Mom, don't guide me or tell me where to go. Just let me do what I want to do." My prayer: I hope that God gives me the strength to stand back and let her go. It's part of life; I did the same, I'm sure. But, as a mother now, I need to know that her growth is normal and her asserting herself is all part of the plan God has in mind for her. I pray that as she learns to be independent, she will, at the same time, realize her need for God. If she doesn't want me to guide her all of the time, that's fine; let her choose a better guide than me! Let her choose His hand to hold!!

3: Then: Between 4-5 months we watched as Kayleigh began to play in her exersaucer, grabbing at rattles, chewing on stuffed objects, even pushing buttons that made music (her first real love!). I was so proud and would sit and start at her for hours, something I hope I have the time to do with little man ... (haha). I was so worried I'd miss something big, that I made sure I was taking note of all of her little progresses. Now: I wish her movements were so innocent .. :) She grabs at toys, shoes, "ABOOK!," "KTT," chews on "CACKERS," "TOOOAST," drinks "JUICE," opens the doors to go "OUTSIDE," and even (just yesterday) sits down on her butt to scoot "DOWNSTAIRS." She chases and is completely obsessed with "BALLS" and never, ever wants to be apart from people, especially new ones (and BRI BRI). She walks right up to strangers and says, "OUT OUT" because she's completely trusting and hasn't really encountered people who don't like her. And, she dances ... oh does this dutch baby girl dance. She climbs up onto her big girl bed, turns on the stereo and starts moving all over the place. Just yesterday she copied some very suggestive dance moves on the CBS early show from The Pussycat Dolls. My prayer: Just like her growing independence, I pray that God directs her movements. I pray that he helps her to use her movements to glorify Him and not herself or worse yet, other people.

Sigh, I think I could go on, but as it is approaching Kayleigh's time to be "rescued" from her bed ... I should start wrapping this up. I praise God for the little blessing Kayleigh has been to us. I can't believe how incredible she's turning out to be. It makes me so ready for my little man (although with him, I'm sure I'll have to continuously remind myself that he is not his sister!). Either way, I'm so thankful that God has given me the time at home (stressful as it is sometimes) to watch them both grow, treasure each moment, and take time to think about how quickly it all goes. Hopefully you have something to think back and treasure as well this morning. :)

Busy-ness

Throughout the past year, as I've been working at home and full time mothering, I've really felt like I made a great decision. I am 100% here for Kayleigh, well, 90% when I'm not in meetings or coaching, and that has been fantastic. Another side benefit to that is that my stress levels have managed, for the most part, to stay relatively low. Sure we have busy days and things that come up, but I don't find myself frantically running from place to place, task to task all of the time. At first it was spooky and I always felt like I was forgetting something. Then, it became incredible as I caught up on all the rest my body lacked. Finally, it was enjoyable to fill the time with things I always wanted to make time for. I was able to spend an hour each morning in Bible study and prayer; I could blog; I could EXERCISE at a reasonable hour (not 5:00 a.m. or 8:00 p.m.!). I could do laundry during the day instead of the hours from 7:00 - 11:00 p.m. on Sundays. Somehow, though, despite that bliss, the busy-ness has managed to creep back into my life all over again. I'm shocked at how unaware to its prowl I was. I never saw it coming until I feel those moments of breathlessness, of panic, when you realize that all of a sudden your commitments have overtaken your time again. When I share this shock and awe with family, friends of mine or former colleagues they simply shake their head as if to say, "Its you, Kristi; It's in your being." But I don't think it has to be ... I think I let it be ... And after I get through this season (basically chaos from now until ohhh August ...), I'm going to make a concentrated effort to change that ... Perhaps I'll develop a system of determining what to say yes to, how to approach each decision so that it's adequately evaluated based on its importance and its potential to send me back to the panic state. ...

Well, it's 7:54, Kayleigh has been calling my name for the past 25 minutes, and it would appear that going BACK to sleep is not on her agenda (despite the fact I KNOW she's over tired). We're going to make the most of our morning with breakfast, a few more loads of laundry, a quick trip to Meijers, wrapping baby shower gifts/birthday presents, and having a snack all before she hits her 11:00 nap time ... wish me luck ... and let's hope little baby boy decides he's going to nap through most of it :) ...

Here's a little fun to smile at on YOUR busy days ... Kayleigh loves her Daddy's new toy. Any surprises there??

[caption id="attachment_147" align="alignnone" width="225" caption="Kayleigh learns about Toy Story from Daddy's iPad."][/caption]

Little Lessons

I decided this morning during my usual "blogging time" that I had nothing to say. We had a crazy busy weekend getting the house ready and prepped for Jr. But that made for very little bloggable fun. I mean, no one really wants to hear about all of my window washing and room cleaning craziness that has since completely knocked me flat, rendering me relatively useless for other tasks :) (Much less finishing the insanely thorough job I began  ... oh well, maybe this coming weekend ...) :) And no one needs to hear me whine about Kayleigh's awful temper tantrum during Sunday brunch, or her horrible nap schedule following the incident, her waking nearly every hour on the hour all night long, and her massive yeast infection (again). So ... that led me to believe I had nothing about which to blog. UNTIL ... kiddo woke up. Despite her pathetic sleeping schedule yesterday, going to bed almost a full hour later than normal, awful night of sleep, and early wake up ... She was a gem this morning. I can't resist sharing all of the "little moments" that made my morning oh so priceless:

- Kayleigh woke, hugged her mommy, and, after her diaper change, ran straight to her breakfast chair. She said "fast, Momma fast." Indicating she would like her breakfast right away this a.m. (sometimes she waits a bit to wake up completely). She ate very well ...

- We are working on NOT throwing unwanted food on the floor and this a.m. she demonstrated excellent mastery of this by saying, "All done, Momma" and placing each piece of uneaten toast and all bits of leftover Cheerios on the serving plate.

- After she got down, she tore off to her room to put in her "pretties" (aka her strawberry barettes from Aunt Alaina) before running back to clean up the "tash" in the living room. She threw away a few scraps of paper from the floor, the box from Sarah's present left out, and some packing waste.

- She helped me with the laundry (selecting all of her clothes from the dryer and placing them gently back in her hamper for hanging and folding)

- Kayleigh now says her own name (ya - yee is what it sounds like) and she and I have this game where I get down on the floor with her, crawl towards her and say, "Mommy ..... Loves .... Kayleigh" and then attack her with kisses. Usually by the time I change my position and tone she knows what we're doing and promptly lays down ready for the onslaught. Today before I even said "Mommy ... " she SCREAMED "YA-YEEE!!! YA-YEEEE" and laid down giggling for her tickles and hugs ... I smiled. At least she knows at this stage in her life that Mommy loves her.

- She proceeded to snuggle up on my lap and watch the "coupon clipping" segment on the Today show while snacking on her leftover toast (and determinedly trying to share some with kitty ... "Kttt ...toast...mouth ... KTT toast...mouth."

- We listened to music in her room, where I had to wear the "glasses" because she was wearing the "pretties" and she brushed my hair and danced to music while teaching herself a new word "holes..." (She was quite disturbed by the holes in Mommy's (Daddy's really since all of Mommy's tshirts are too small) tshirt).

- Then after another load of laundry, Kayleigh snuggled up and let me read the "Going to Bed" book with her, where she chimed in on a few pages, "BATH!!!" ... "TEETH" .. and "NIGHT NIGHT." Then when I said it was nap time she slid off my lap, grabbed her blanket, said "Mommy ... up" pointed to her room, and her pacis, smiled and said "Papa ..." She happily took it, laid down immediately and said, "Momma night night ..."

I love my toddler so much ... and sometimes she makes being a mommy the MOST fun in the world. Her communication skills grow each day and that makes the bond we have stronger as we learn to share different things. :) I can't wait until she meets her brother and learns to bond with him as well. I am truly blessed.

Thanks for letting me rave about my smart little peanut ... I think I'm going to use her nap time to catch up a little myself. That way I can enjoy the beauty of the day when it's time to coach starting at 3:00.

Hugs, Kristi

Life’s Blessings

As I'm getting prepared for my 34 week appointment with the OB, coming off a very poor sleeping night, I'm slipping into one of those "mad at the world" stages. You know the kind where every inconvenience sends you into its own separate spiral of "life is so unfair." You realize you're being ridiculous and so stupid, but you just don't care. Since I don't really care to dwell on these thoughts or ruin an entire day by focusing on all the "negatives" I'm going list them, get them out ... and then focus on the blessings instead. My stupid, trivial gripes Despite my best attempts at exercise and a balanced diet I have exceeded the weight gain from my first pregnancy! My feet are swollen Sleep is nearly impossible with this giant belly I ache all the time (back, hips, legs, FEET) My toddler is choosing now go through her terrible two's (yesterday we had 3 temper tantrums lasting in almost 20 mins each, accompanied by some of her first spankings) I don't have energy to keep up with the housework that little Kayleigh CONSTANTLY creates, much less make headway on my work for $$.

The Blessings God gave me that make those seem ridiculous * Baby Boy __________ - a clean bill of health for him so far, he's getting to the point where he responds to Mommy (Kayleigh used to "snuggle her little body into my hand when she felt me. ____ does the opposite and squiggles away, pretty sure he's not gonna be the snuggler that she was), I will only have 6 more weeks until I can hold him with my arms!, he's a treasure given to us from God who will enrich our lives daily ...

* Kayleigh - is growing into a little person a little more each day!! She is so verbal! She understands almost everything Mommy says and, usually, follows instructions VERY well. Her favorites include: eating Ritz crackers (it's usually the first word out of her mouth each morning), drinking juice, shaking her head "no," sitting on big girl couches and big girl chairs, being independent, doing ANYTHING that Mommy does (see picture below), swinging a tennis racquet, chasing balls of all kinds, "reading" books to Mommy, watching t.v. (for about 10 minutes at the most because she can't sit still longer than that), emptying out every cupboard she can find, giving herself baths (without water), talking to her cousin, Ryan (who isn't even usually there), and following Bri around constantly.

* Steve - my patient, loving husband who senses in an instant when he needs to "take on dinner" or take Kayleigh on an errand so Mommy has 10 minutes alone, who never complains (and even offers more often than not) about hunting down whatever food I crave, who works odd hours (like 5 a.m. to 3 p.m.) so I can assist with tennis matches without my daughter tagging along, and gets Kayleigh when she does cry at night because he knows how difficult it is for me to get out of the pillow pile, past the cat, and into K's room without killing myself :)

Yeah, I've got plenty to be thankful for and not many long term gripes ... :) Now it's 8:04 and sunshine is up, flicking her fan/light on and off, on and off and repeating to herself each word ... Click .."OOOONN," Click "OFFF," Click "ONNNN," Click "Off...." MOMMMAAA ... and it repeats again. I think it's time for breakfast :)

[caption id="attachment_142" align="alignnone" width="225" caption="Anyone studying my mother's photo albums will see a striking resemblance here ... "][/caption]

Springtime fun …

I love these girls ... so so much ... Sometimes it's hard to balance motherhood and coaching; these girls make it worth it. I <3 K Christian Tennis!

[caption id="attachment_139" align="alignnone" width="300" caption="Mud splatter + high ponytails = my love"][/caption]

Easter Sunday

Our Holy Week has been less than traditional this year. We are sandwiched between two Spring Break schedules (K Christian ending on Easter Sunday and Zeeland Christian/Wyoming beginning on Good Friday!)! Therefore, we were busy last week with our dog sitting and we are back to the usual this week while our families are scattered abroad. In addition to that, Steve was all set to play his trumpet for church in the brass band, and Kayleigh got a cold. Since I have a HUGE problem with people who bring children to the church nursery sick, I thought it would be most hypocritical to take my coughing tot to church ... even on Easter. I was longing to celebrate the greatest holiday (in my opinion) in the calendar year with friends in a place honoring God's sacrifice and triumph! BUT, it seemed that that was not what God had planned for me this Sunday. So today, while my daughter enters into the 3rd hour of her Sunday nap and my husband passes his first hour marker, I'm going to reflect on the discombobulated ways God reminded me of His blessings this week. (1). Our Easter season began with Palm Sunday last week where we were able to attend church with Jordan :) It was good to hear and sing praises to God, and it was nice to have an extra member to the family to make that feel extra celebratory (2). We left to Mom's right after Palm Sunday and had plenty of joyous moments during our "Early Easter" dinner. Ryan smiled and cooed and blew lots of bubbles. Kayleigh hunted Easter Eggs, dished out hugs to Grammy, and "kisses" to Ryan, and even little _____ was awake, alert and active as we took loads of pictures of the kids in their Easter garb. (3). Throughout the rest of the week God blessed us with gorgeously sunny weather and beautiful opportunities to explore and experience his creation. As I walked the dogs every day past the church we attend, I was reminded to reflect on the sacrifice made to atone for all of my shortcomings. (4) On Friday, Dan and Alaina came to spend some time with us ... I know it's no replacement for a Good Friday service and there was really nothing about their visit that reminded me of Jesus's death. But I know they'd agree that the giving up and sending away of your first born child takes on a whole new meaning when you have a first born child staring you in the face. Ryan and Kayleigh are precious treasures that both of their parents would die defending ... thinking of God's sacrifice to willingly surrender his first born, only son is incomprehensible. (5). This Sunday, when I discovered we wouldn't be attending church as a family ... Steve suggested I live stream Calvary's service. Since nothing spells Easter Sunday service to me like full choir, orchestra, and lots of joyfilled singing, I think this was a perfect suggestion. So, from the comfort of my own glider (now ready for little ____ in the living room), with my toddler snuggled on the footrest at my feet, I listened to the anthem with soloist Corey Niemchick (not sure he even goes by that anymore), sang along with the choir to Christ the Lord is Risen Today, listened to Jim's sermon and the powerful testimony of a brave couple, and watched baptisms along with their professions of faith in Jesus. I was blessed by the service in a way I didn't think I could be watching it on television! (It didn't hurt that Kayleigh was snuggling and dancing with freedom that only comes when you're home with Mommy.

Enjoy a few pictures from our Palm Sunday dinner, courtesy of my excellent photo taking sister-in-law, Alaina.

[caption id="attachment_129" align="alignnone" width="300" caption="K was laughing and giggling and Grammy rocked her back and forth"][/caption]

[caption id="attachment_130" align="alignnone" width="300" caption="It's hard not to love these two, even if you aren't biased. "][/caption]

[caption id="attachment_131" align="alignnone" width="300" caption="We're working on perfecting Kayleigh's technique ... She has the idea but not the execution"][/caption]

[caption id="attachment_132" align="alignnone" width="300" caption="I adore this baby boy!"][/caption]

[caption id="attachment_133" align="alignnone" width="300" caption="Dan, Alaina and Ryan "][/caption]

[caption id="attachment_134" align="alignnone" width="200" caption="Steve, Kristi, Kayleigh and _____ "][/caption]

[caption id="attachment_135" align="alignnone" width="300" caption="Grandpa and Ryan, Grandma and Kayleigh"][/caption]

He is RISEN; He is RISEN indeed!

Our little helper

Steve and I have been so blessed since Kayleigh was born with her sunny disposition. Even when she's sick, she's far more likely to snuggle or ask to sleep than she is to be fussy or irritable. Our baby is growing up into a very good little mother's helper. She passes me clothes from the laundry, dishes from the dishwasher, and picks up her toys and clothes to the best of her ability. When I'm putting away her clothing after laundry she gets most frustrated because she can't reach to hang the hanger by herself. As our playdates with Ryan have increased, she's learning to give him his pacifier (instead of stealing it), share toys, and kiss the baby. She's learning what babies look like, who they are, and how much they need a gentle touch and not aggressiveness. It's truly a blessing as we anticipate our new little one in approximately 7 weeks. Today, after we moved back into our house from Ipemas, Kayleigh wanted to help her daddy paint little _____'s room. Daddy was working hard to measure out the block M just perfectly before he started applying the maize colored paint. After the measuring was done, Daddy lifted Kayleigh up to paint a little piece of her brother's room. She was thrilled (and a little bit sad that she couldn't keep "helping") to be a part, even if she doesn't completely understand all of the ramifications of what is to come.

Here's my photo of the day of my favorite little helper.

[caption id="attachment_125" align="alignnone" width="225" caption="Kayleigh helps to paint her little brother's room"][/caption]

Woof Woof

This week, starting on Friday afternoon, we took over "parenting" the animals owned by our good friends, the Ipemas. We have "adopted" (for the week) a senior golden retriever, Star; an older long haired (not sure on the breed) cat, Smokey; and a young gun Bernisse Mountain Dog, Zoey. Within the first 12 hours, I quickly learned that walks would be (at minimum) a twice daily routine for Zoey. She's FULL of energy and not quite ready to let it loose in the yard like her big sister, Starlight. So, Zoey and I (and Kayleigh) are getting our exercise this week. :) I'm not sure I'd recommend beginning to parent a large breed dog at 32 weeks pregnant; I just can't waddle fast enough, no matter how hard I try :). BUT we're getting through it. Kayleigh is learning all about dogs this week. She's already an avid cat lover and climbs the stairs to see Smokey the (K .. K...) several times throughout the day. She knows her way around the upstairs and can "sniff out" the kitty's hiding place without much trouble. BUT since Andre is the ONLY pet in our house (and probably a fairly lonely one this week), Kayleigh is learning about dogs. Her Grammy Creswell taught her how to say Woof Woof when referring to Brittany, but Brittany is far more cat-like than the dogs Kayleigh is living with right now. It takes quite a bit of courage for a 16 month old to look Zoey in the eye and not go screaming for your Mommy :) ... BUT we're learning because, Kayleigh, no I will not pick you "Out Out" every time the doggie comes towards you.

Catch the latest image from Zoey and Kayleigh ... they were watching "Daddy" make burgers for supper and Starlight was playing loose in the backyard. Both of them seem to be saying, "How come SHE is so lucky?" or "When is it MY turn?"

[caption id="attachment_117" align="alignnone" width="225" caption="Kayleigh and Zoey scheme about how to get "OUTSIDE""][/caption]

My “almost” Spring Break

It's crazy how fast the tempo and tenor of your life changes with a toddler ... I'm so used to my routine that any breakage in the daily rituals makes me feel so off balance! Kayleigh typically wakes between 8 and 8:30, so to be sitting on the couch with kitty on my legs, looking at the sun play off of the windows ... hearing nothing but the hum of the fridge at 8:26 ... is a rare moment indeed. I have my 32 week appointment in two hours and Steve took Kayleigh to Zeeland for some errands. After the appointment, we're moving in to Ipema's to watch the pets over Spring Break. But for now, it's a lazy, slow start to the a.m. for me. I couldn't be more grateful. I probably have very few of these left for quite some time :) ... I think today might be the first day in almost 20 years that I feel oddly "left out" of the Spring Break excitement (I changed my email theme to a sandy beach in order to help me feel a little "slice" of the fun). There's nothing quite so refreshing as getting to Spring Break as a teacher/student. You know that afterwards it's a straight up adrenaline rush (at least it was in 8th grade) until the last day of school in June. You hardly have time for a breath, so Spring Break is literally the first step to summer. As a stay-at-home Mommy, I find my calendar is geared up quite differently. I'm not so much looking forward to Spring Break, but sunshine, warmer temperatures, the pleasures of being OUTSIDE! Kayleigh just learned this word and is such a fan. In fact, yesterday, I asked Andre if he wanted to go outside (aka play in the garage) and Kayleigh toddled to her room to get her coat, slung it over her shoulder and kept repeating OUTSIDE, OUTSIDE, OUTSIDE ... I can't wait for consistently beautiful days so we can take walks, play in the park, spend time in the backyard, and enjoy being in the fresh, open air. Tennis helps us get plenty of fresh air and outside time, but there's something about an early morning walk that makes life that much better :). Soon ... Soon ... I believe MY spring "break" will be coming :) ... And very shortly after, Lord willing, another little treasure.

Well, I believe I've used enough of my blissful morning reflecting on what makes me smile ... time to get Kayleigh's goodies packed up to spend the night somewhere else. Enjoy Spring Break and the beautiful beaches my friends :) (or the short wait you have because your week is next week). I'll enjoy my extra time (tennis practice free) to get caught up on work :) ... Looking for my Spring "break" soon.

Here's a photo of Kayleigh, enjoying one of the unseasonably warmer days. She's exploring the backyard ... sipping on a Dew (she never had it full, she just loves carrying it around because that's what Daddy does) ...

[caption id="attachment_112" align="alignnone" width="225" caption="Kayleigh's first trip out to her own backyard"][/caption]